what she says: you can touch my hair if you want
what she means: please for the love of god play with my hair feel how soft it is i will roll over into your lap like a kitten

etheral-merkabah:

blazepress:

Love at first sight is dangerous.

This is so cool.

(via ruinedchildhood)


itsonlynoon:

poshxspice:

subject13fringe:

montypythonandtheholyblog:

today I learned that if you want to slash someone’s tires, don’t slash all four; only slash three because if you slash all four their insurance will pay for it but if you only slash three they have to pay for it all out of pocket 

image

today on satan makes a blog post

in other news if someone slashes your tires but only slashes 3, slash the remaining tire so your insurance will pay for it instead of paying out of pocket.

(via tutuleprime)


oceanashenue:

so today my ap art history teacher was teaching us about Hapshetsut the only female pharaoh and he was like “have you seen women they can pop out a baby and be like alright let’s go” and then he walked over to this guy and aimed his fist towards his balls and the guy flinched and held his crotch so he was like “men may be stronger but women are tougher” and then he said “so when someone tells you to grow a pair, they mean ovaries”

(via titanswithnoprivateslivein221b)


thebrokenheartedthatstillsing:

maxkirin:

"This sentence has five words. Here are five more words. Five-word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It’s like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety. Now listen. I vary the sentence length, and I create music. Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length. And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals—sounds that say listen to this, it is important.” - Gary Provost

Reading this was so satisfying woah

(via cestbientriste)


karate-and-friendship:

Spot the difference.

(via memewhore)



ellendegeneres:

Noah has a close encounter with a Triceratops

(via bestnatesmithever)


taraatrandom:

pr1nceshawn:

Shocking Truths Behind What Cat Behaviors Really Mean…

All true.

(via otps-johnlocksterekmoreiddestiel)


shamelesslyunladylike:

lesradicalfeminisms:

tumbling-torterra:

a-strawbarry:

houseofheavy:

etspiritusvitae:

the female body is hardcore as fuck. 

Yes is it.

so is the male body
it’s sad to see so many people like this on this website


OP is praising the fact that women hold a fucking infant in their belly the size of a ribcage, get the fuck over yourself for 3.5 seconds.

*~*~follow for more fragile male ego~*~*

The male body is more susceptible to hereditary diseases because of their lack of a second X chromosome. Their testosterone production ages them faster and causes them to die sooner. Their center of gravity is higher because of their tiny little hips and overgrown shoulders, making them easier to topple. Their gonads are placed outside of the body, in a very vulnerable position, because they do not function properly if they get a little bit warmer than usual. They have non-functional nipples, but still enough breast tissue to get cancer.The male body is not hardcore. The male body is to the female body what a shoddy, unstable mod is to a well-estabilished piece of software. Sit the fuck down. And try to not crush your fragile pathetic outside gonads when you do it.

shamelesslyunladylike:

lesradicalfeminisms:

tumbling-torterra:

a-strawbarry:

houseofheavy:

etspiritusvitae:

the female body is hardcore as fuck. 

Yes is it.

so is the male body

it’s sad to see so many people like this on this website

OP is praising the fact that women hold a fucking infant in their belly the size of a ribcage, get the fuck over yourself for 3.5 seconds.

*~*~follow for more fragile male ego~*~*

The male body is more susceptible to hereditary diseases because of their lack of a second X chromosome. Their testosterone production ages them faster and causes them to die sooner. Their center of gravity is higher because of their tiny little hips and overgrown shoulders, making them easier to topple. Their gonads are placed outside of the body, in a very vulnerable position, because they do not function properly if they get a little bit warmer than usual. They have non-functional nipples, but still enough breast tissue to get cancer.

The male body is not hardcore. The male body is to the female body what a shoddy, unstable mod is to a well-estabilished piece of software. Sit the fuck down. And try to not crush your fragile pathetic outside gonads when you do it.

(via silverspeckledclouds)